Just a little. Not the usual holiday panic about getting it all done. I’m good. I don’t bake tons, I do some shopping, but not a crazy amount. There is a little wrapping that still needs to be done, but those gifts won’t be exchanged until December 28th. The kids are out of school, so they will be here wanting to eat and make messes all day, but that’s not such a big deal. What I’m panicking about is that it’s going to be over soon. Wasn’t it just a few days ago that I was so excited that the season was just beginning? Wasn’t it just yesterday we got the tree? How is it already just a few days before Christmas? How do you folks who take your tree down on the 26th do it? How do you stand all this buildup and hype, the anticipation and excitement and then, BAM, wake up just one day after the climax and it’s over? I mean, don’t get me wrong. Come January, I’ll be ready to get the kids back in school and get back to a regular schedule and a normal life. But I can’t just hit a brick wall like that. I just can’t.
So, I’m panicking just a tad that the holidays of 2013, when my babies are 3, 8, and 9, is just flying by. Next year Girlie Bird will be 10, almost 11, at Christmas. The teenage years are just MINUTES away. And Baby Bird, he’s going to be almost FIVE next Christmas and hurdling toward kindergarten. Once they’re all in school, and I’m working full time again, THEN I’ll be a mess at Christmas, I guess. I don’t know how I’ll get it all done then.
I’m freaking out a bit that the year is coming to a close a little too soon, but maybe it isn’t the holidays that are moving too fast. Maybe what’s really got me scrambling is the thought that I’m going to turn around and the years of Santa Claus and childhood magic will be nothing by happy memories. I’ll be glad to have those memories, but I just want to hang on to the sweetness of the present.