Today my beautiful Girlie turns ten. Well yesterday, since I didn’t get this posted before midnight. The big double digit milestone is here. She is thrilled to be planning to get her ears pieced. She’s thrilled to be TEN. She’s thrilled. I am thrilled to have survived a decade of parenting her. I’ve got another decade and a half of in-the-trenches, minute-to-minute parenting to go, but this seems like a major milestone for me, and for her father, as parents. She’s a tween now, so I’m under no delusions that we’ve passed the really hard stuff. In fact I feel a bit like all of this has been training and now the really rough stuff begins. Like I’ve “leveled up.”
When my friends and I started having babies, we were a whole new generation of moms. Our mothers had moved away from extended families in large numbers. Maybe that’s because so many were children of divorce, I don’t know. I just know that it seems much more common for my generation to have grown up at least a long car ride away from our grandparents. Our mothers had the benefits of nearby aunts and grandmothers less often than their mothers had. I think they mostly did alright, but when we grew up, we didn’t expected that kind of “village” to help us figure out parenting. We turned to another kind of village: the internet.
Good grief we’ve made connections, there, haven’t we? You can find communities for whatever kind of parent you are, strive to be, our wish you were. Attachment parenting, natural parenting, new age parenting, whatever, there’s a group, blog, website, message board, something. You can find somebody to tell you that you’re doing it right.
At some point I stopped reading sites or blogs about “how” and just started enjoying other parents’ experiences. And here, I share mine. I fell into my own rhythm. Maybe we just had Muddle so fast that I didn’t have time to second guess anymore. I let the pressure off myself and started to enjoy the ride. We’ve come a long way. In my daughter’s first days at home, we took her picture with our ONE megapixel Kodak. Now I’ve got a camera on my phone (where I’m writing this post) that’s 10 times improved. Life is changing fast. I’m getting dizzy thinking of it. But we better just hold on. Because it’s going faster and I’ve got less control than ever.
On another wonderful note, my friends, Ray Lees and Matthew Christman Lees, finally got married. Finally, the federal government recognizes that the two of them and their eight children are one, whole, legal, fabulous, equal, beautiful family! I’m giddy happy for them all. Congratulations to the Lees Family!